Louisiana Warrior Dash

I am so awesome, people!

Seriously. I don't even know how to tell you how awesome I truly am.

I did the Louisiana Warrior Dash with Niki and her family. And I was pretty sure I would
#1: die
or
#2: not finish.

But I did neither! I made all of the obstacles, finished in an hour and a half, and LOVED it! I was pretty nervous the week before. See, up until 3 weeks out I had no idea there were obstacles... or fire...or barbed wire... I thought it was a nice, fun, stroll through the mud. And I love mud! Nope- it has 12 obstacles and is described as 3 miles of pure hell on the website. I am a clumsy oaf, folks. I was scared!

And then they send the release form, which informs you that you must have insurance, the obstacles are extremely dangerous, there will be fire, barbed wire and other forms of torture (my words, not theirs), you have to swim through water of unknown sources, there may be harmful plants and bugs... and, of course, they are responsible for nothing that may befall you. It was a good read...

Let's review:
It started off as about a mile of trekking through knee to ankle deep, slippery, sliding, mud or muddy water. That alone was quite an accomplishment. Then there were 12 obstacles and more running (walking in our case) through sand and mud:

Capsized Catamaran:
We had to jump into muddy water, swim up to, and climb on some floating plastic "stuff". Then you balance your way across and climb down.

Teetering Traverse:
This was my first big challenge. It was a (muddy) balance beam about 8 feet off the ground. Sounds easy, but I am afraid of heights. Almost barfed, but I made it. This nice girl named Kathryn held my hand. :)

Trenches:
A crawl through a dug-out trench with barbed wire. The bad part was you were crawling over pebbles. My knees have scars to prove it!

These nice people got hay to crawl on!

Warrior Wall:

I dreaded this all week! I have zero upper body strength and I am petrified of climbing and heights. But I wanted to at least try. The guy in front of me saw me quaking in fear and told me to use my arms only to hold on, and push myself up with my legs. I made it!! I was ridiculously proud and Niki and I hugged and jumped in circles after we both made it. 

The little "steps" are not even half an inch deep! And our wall was taller than this. 

Storming Normandy:

This was more under barbed-wire and net crawling. 

Barricade Breakdown:

This obstacle was under/over hurdles. Which doesn't sounds too hard until you remember you have been going for a while and your legs really don't want to push you over!

Hard Rain:

A wall to climb up with water pouring down on you the entire way. The worst part for me was having to jump 10 feet down on the other side. I almost crawled back down and walked around.

Tipsy Tightrope:

This is two ropes, one about your head and one under your feet. You have to shimmy along the rope to the other side. 

Cargo Climb:

This one was fun! Climb up, over and down a cargo net. There was a camera projecting to the finish and waiting area so I took the opportunity to wiggle my mud covered booty at everyone!

Junkyard Jump:

Run through tires and climb over junk heap cars. This is pretty fun because, really, when else do you get to jump up and down on the top of a car?

Warrior Roast:

Poor Niki almost didn't go for this one- you jump over fire. We held hands and screamed the entire way. Luckily, there were photographers at this one so I'll be sure to post those lovely shots when available. 

Muddy Mayhem:

You have to scramble/swim through muddy water under even more barbed wire. These people loved their barbed wire. 

This is our post race victory photo!

The Pink Warriors: Niki, Ashley, Mama Ruth and Staci (team captain)

I have never done any kind of a race (and seeing as I hate running, I don't plan to)- but this was an absolute ball! It's a great thing to do with friends and go it together for some laughs. I was a little sore the next day, and I think it was three showers later before I got all of the mud, leaves and grass off- but it was completely worth it! 

As one lady behind us commented: "This is just an excuse for adults to play in the mud."

Yep! 

Quotable!

I love quotes. i could probably have an entire wall in my house full of quotes. Pinterest makes my obsession so much easier! Especially the people at Some E Cards. LOVE those!! Here are a few of my faves since i started using Pinterest.

This happened to me so many times in Florida! Now i just avoid meetings.

I hate camping.

I learned this from my Mama

Geaux Tigers!!!

Amen!

A Staunch Demublican

So, I was talking to my friend Ashley (yes, we have the same name and yes, that's how we became friends) last night and discussing politics. I enjoy discussing politics- crazy, I know. But I should clarify; I enjoy discussing politics if you are able to do so in a sane, unemotional way. You know how they are always talking about the 1% and the 99%? Well, there is another demographic that fits into that ratio: the percentage of people that can discuss politics rationally. And just so you know- no one on FOX or CNN have the ability to do so. MSNBC tries.

At any rate, we were discussing our political affiliations and I finally declared myself a Demublican. I'm too conservative to be a full on Democrat. I believe in things in moderation, and calculated, planned change. Sorry- not right wing enough. On the other hand- the GOP is really just a party of old, fat, white good ole boys. I am much too progressive for that. So there you go- I am a Demublican. I can't be an Independent because that party gets nothing done- and I am a get it done kind of girl.

After our chat, I thought about it more. You know- it really would be nice if we could all just be American. Nieves idea, I know this. But united we stand and divided we fall. And let's face it- we are divided and we are falling as of late. So maybe instead of bashing each other through November we could try to grow that 1%.

Hahaha- yeah right!

This is Ashley, fondly referred to as "AC." How cute are we?

"I'm With You" and "Fight Like a Girl"

I love music. It's an utter tragedy that I am not Jennifer Nettles because I would be an awesome her. I am so serious.

Most of the time it's the lyrics that get me. I can find something deep is the most ridiculous songs sometimes! Yesterday I listened to two songs that really made me think.

I'm With You
http://youtu.be/NHZZyNGvOVY

This song is so utterly moving to me. My sister sent it to me once when we were going through a rough family patch. She reminded me that we always had each other. Haven't you ever felt like you were just trying to scrape up yourself and hold on? I have. But every time, every single time, God has sent one or all of my friends to stand next to me and face whatever it was. This song always lifts me up and holds me, and I listen to it and sing it as a prayer for my own friends- that I can be this for them as well. Women are powerful. And when we face things bound together we are a force.

Love is a hurricane in a blue sky,

I didn't see it coming, never knew why,

All the laughter and the dream, all the memories in between, washed away in a steady stream.

Love is a hunger, a famine in your soul.

I thought I planted beauty but it would never grow. 

Now I'm on my hands and knees, trying to gather up my dreams, trying to hold on to anything.

We could shake our fists at times like this, when we don't understand,

or we could just hold hands.

You and me, me and you, where you go, I'll go too,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

'Till your heart finds a home, I won't let you feel alone,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

You do your best to build a higher wall.

To keep love safe from any wrecking ball.

When the dust is clear we will see the house that love rebuilt,

guarding beauty that lives here still. 

You and me, me and you, where you go, I'll go too,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

'Till your heart finds a home, I won't let you feel alone,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

Who can say I'm left with nothing?

When I have all of you, all of you.

In the way you've always loved me,

I remember, He does too...

You and me, me and you, where you go, I'll go too,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

'Till your heart finds a home, I won't let you feel alone,

I'm with you, I'm with you.

Me and you are gonna make it through, me and you.

I'm with you, I'm with you. 

Fight Like a Girl
http://youtu.be/V96r2046qjE

Niki had on the music station on her TV last night and a throw-back one hit wonder country song (Sorry, S) came on. I loved this song when it was out and I think I still do. I have been conducting an inner debate with myself lately on my strengths and what I am good at. I am good at my job right now. I get by. But I was great at my last job. Like- really, really good. But I didn't like the person it made me. That's a weird place. It's kind of hard sometimes to find your spot and balance what you can do with where you want to go with who you want to be. Plus- I really was the second verse here. I fought and fought and kicked ass and just hit the ceiling. That "glass ceiling" has my finger prints all over it. A lot of this song is who I want to be.

...You're brave and beautiful.

So hold your head high.

Don't ever let them define the light in your eyes.

Love yourself, give 'em hell,

You can take on this world.

You just stand and be strong and fight like a girl...

She was wheeling and dealing. 

Kept on hitting that same glass ceiling.

She was never gonna be one of the boys, no.

She could have given up her ambitions,

And spent the rest of her life just wishin'...

So hold your head high.

Don't ever let them define the light in your eyes.

Love your self, give 'em hell.

You can take on this world,

You just stand and be strong and then fight like a girl.

Oh, with style and grace, kick ass and take names...

(You just have to love that last line!)

1000 Gifts

I am behind! I got off track. Oops. Remember to count life's gifts! Here are a few more of mine.

41. Glitter

42. Lunch break excursions

43. My nephew's crazy faces

44. Laughter

45. A clean horse

46. Dirty toes

47. Naps

48. Summer storms

49. A great coworker

50. Pools

51. Planning vacations

52. Craft projects

53. Deer in your friend's backyard

54. Pedicures

55. The word "Auntie" coming from my niece

56. Dog kisses

57. Mud puddles

58. Fresh cut grass

59. Summer tomatoes

60. Sunshine

Happy Anniversary!

Happy 32nd Anniversary to my Mommy and Daddy! Love these two!

They're pretty cute, don't you think? I have been so blessed to have them as my parents. 

Congrats, you two! You've managed to produce three of the most beautiful, talented and gracious (also humble...) people on earth! ;)

Triathlons (An Instructional Post)

I have recently became a triathlon fan. Not because I think exercise is fun, but because my friend Allyson decided to start participating in them. Let's be clear: she is completely nuts! There is entirely too much exercise involved in these events. And all before 9am. Not rational. However- in my ever present effort to make all things fun (even waking up at 5:30am on a Sunday to watch people hike and bike), Marissa and I have worked out a system to make these races entertaining for ourselves as well as Allyson.

First and foremost, sign making is a must. This is how your evening should look the day before a race:

Signage must be bright and involve glitter, and if you are getting up before daylight on a weekend you owe yourself a glass of wine. 

Do not use standard signs. Customization is a must.

Our first attendance was a Mother's Day race, thus we thought it'd be funny to pretend she was our mom.

Standard "Fan Club" signs are OK if they have glitter.

Signs that involve alcohol get comments from other racers as well. One we received: "Can complete strangers get a mimosa?" Uh- yes! But only if you hurry because Marissa and I are good drinkers, there may be none left.

On the way to the race, get coffee. A lot. You are going to need it and you'll kick yourself if you think you can wait until after. You cannot. 

Do not follow the directions for parking a half mile away. Whatever! Do YOU look like a triathlete? No. Leave the exercise to them and drive into the neighborhood next to the event and park on the street. 

You are going to be waiting around a lot, so your best bet is to bring a friend. 

Generally, you hurry up to get to the first part (swimming), see the racers and then wait for the next section (biking or running). You might get to see them going for the transition, but the best idea is to get to the point where they'll be coming out on the bikes. They're going to need the encouragement to get going. Yell, jump and act a-fool to get them going. Their faces should look something like this:

The goal is laughter on their way off. But if you get this:

It's OK. She's just trying to figure out #1: WHY she puts up with you and #2: WHY she signed up for this crap.

After they are off for round two you wait. Find a comfy spot, sit down, and get out your cooler.

Don't bring a heavy one because you need to be mobile. This one's perfect- has handles, keeps things very cold and has a pocket to store stuff in. It's also monogrammed, so that helps. 

Be sure to bring water, because you're going to need it. Conceal any alcoholic beverages inside the cooler. You're probably somewhere that open containers aren't allowed. However- I recommend bringing the alcohol. It really helps when you're kicking yourself for being awake. 

While you wait, people watch! You will be surprised at the people who participate. You have a few of what you'd expect: buff, steroid-ed, crazy people going all out. But a lot of the people are just doing it for fun (???) and there's a lot of older men with beer bellies. Who knew?

Every good triathlon needs a bag pipe player in a kilt. 

In the mean time, keep an eye on the people coming in from the current leg of the race. You don't want to miss your person! A good tip is to watch the numbers on their arms. It'll help tell you what wave they are in and you'll get an idea of when your athlete is coming. When you see them coming, be sure to start creating a huge ruckus. Jump, leap, yell, cheer! Glitter should be flying from your sign, folks. Just be careful, if they're coming in fast on their bike they're about to have to dismount. Wouldn't want to distract them so much they nearly miss the jumping off point and fall (Sorry Allyson). 

While they are transitioning RUN (this is the only exercise you get, it's OK) to the next starting point (biking or running- whichever hasn't been done). To be a good fan, you HAVE to be there to cheer them into the last leg. Commence acting a-fool again.

Wait again.

This little girl is a good example of how you might feel after watching hundreds of people run around as the sun comes up. 

Make sure to run at your athlete, yelling their name, after they finish. This is a nice touch. Also give huge hugs, regardless of sweat. I mean, come on, they just swam, biked and ran. They earned it!

Honestly- I have really enjoyed the two I attended. It's a lot of fun to cheer on a friend and you can nap later.