Definitions

I'm reading Captivating again. Scanning/reading is probably a more accurate statement. And re-absorbing the powerful parts of this book that made such an impression on me.

One point it makes is that women tend to be more defined by relationships. We are relational beings, created in God's image to reflect his desire for strong, intimate relationships. I was thinking about that, and I think it's very accurate for many women. Even as the world changes and morphs and women move into bigger leading roles around the globe; these women, we, still hold the roles of mother, daughter, friend, wife, and struggle with balancing these roles with work.

The book says, "Most women define themselves in terms of their relationships, and the quality they deem those relationships to have. I am a mother, a sister, a daughter, a friend. Or, I am alone. I'm not seeing anyone right now, or my children aren't calling, or my friends seem distant."

How true is that for you? It struck a strong chord with me. In thinking about myself and my role before I moved to Texas, I was Ashley Hamlin, DIB Program Manager. My job was so consuming, even when I no longer loved it, the wherever I went in the city, whatever I did, I felt defined by it. I had to be on guard and alert.

Moving to Texas made me anonymous. I have a non-demanding (although rather non-rewarding) job here. But when I walk out of the office door, I'm just Ashley. I am best friend, auntie, sister, daughter, girlfriend. I am whatever that moment makes me. And these roles, these roles that I cherish, now define my life 100% of the time. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how big a difference that loosing that career woman role made in my life.

Don't get me wrong- I miss that role at times. More often these days, actually. And I still entertain the thought of taking it back, although not so seriously I hope! So I certainly don't mean that we, women, should drop them. Not at all. I just mean that if we are more aware of which roles we let take the most weight in our self-definition, how can we change ourselves?

These thoughts have been rolling around a lot in my head recently.

The Pope

It was very ironic for me to give big accolades to Pope Francis this week, because over the weekend I commented to German that I didn't see what the big deal about The Pope was. I fully understand that the role has great historic significance, and I believe whoever is in that role should certainly be honored. But to me, they should be no more important than any leader at the helm of a church. There's a good chance I don't understand this because I'm not Catholic. Fair enough. But (note to newscasters everywhere) I care more about the economy, the wars we are fighting and security than I do about what the Pope is doing. Just saying.

All that being said, whoever is in the role of Pope is absolutely considered a religious leader and what he says and does reflects on all of Christianity, not just Catholics. And in that vein I would like to thakn Pope Francis for setting an amazing example and representing the Christian faith in a kind, loving and generous way. (I'm sure he's been sitting on the edge of his seat waiting for that from me...)

This quote by him last weekend floored me. Completely. I have an incredible amount of respect for anyone in a leadership position willing to make such a statement in the religious environment of the world today. I read an article by someone stating he didn't do that much because the catholic church still condemned homosexuality and  no real change had been made. Noted and accepted. That is a true statement. But for the first time, someone in a position of authority in the church is reminding us to love, not judge. That it isn't our place to condemn anyone. And that above all we are here to do our best to be flawed reflections of Jesus- Jesus who never openly condemned anyone but religious zealots.

So thanks to the Pope for reminding us who we are supposed to be in Christ. I am willing to bet we won't see the leadership of the Baptist, Presbyterian, Lutheran or even my beloved Methodist churches do anything so brave and truthful anytime soon.   

Migraines, Wicked and Willa Cather

I have had two migraines this week... in a row... not fun! I used to get clusters of them when I was in high school, but haven't for years. Now it seems they are making a come back. Does anyone have any suggestions on prevention? I'm going to the doctor next week, but I'm open to suggestions!

I am FINALLY getting to see Wicked this weekend! Sunday night, double date with Niki and Jade, Houston Hobby Center... it's ON! I can't wait!

Over the past few years, I have developed a Willa Cather addiction thanks to Shannon. I love her writing style and her characters. She draws me in without obsessing me and I always feel a part of her stories. And if I could time travel I would go and meet her. I have read My Antonia, One of Ours, The Professor's House and Death Comes for the Archbishop as well as her biography. I just started Sapphira and the Slave Girl. Have you read any? Are you obsessed with her like I am? Tell me! 

Hello Again!

I didn't disappear, I swear. Only from the blog. Here is exactly what happened:
I got so busy living my life I just stopped taking the time to write about it. 

It's a good thing to have happen, really. A very good thing. But I've missed blogging. So here I am, trying to get back to it.

A few updates:

Being in your 30s is AWESOME! 

Seriously, it is. I love it. A switch really does flip in your brain and you care less- about looking perfect, acting perfect, living the perfect life. You sit back and just enjoy more. Sure, you want more. You still strive. But it's easier; more care free. I highly suggest skipping 29 and going straight to 30.

This is NOT old!

So not old. Not even a little bit. Everyone giggled at us when I first relocated to Texas and said we'd get used to having each other there all the time. Nope- not true. People are still giggling at us, but because we are still completely, ridiculously happy together and they just don't know what else to do. We still love going to the grocery together, we still love going for walks, we still talk at least 3 times a day regardless of whether or not we see each other, we still drive her husband crazy. It doesn't get old, people! Move to live with your best friend now.

This happened!

That, ladies and gentlemen, is a boyfriend! A real, live boyfriend. You never thought you'd see the day did you? Me either. But he just followed me home one night. Seriously. That's how it happened. His name is German (Her-Mon), he's Colombian (sexy, I know) and he's adorable. :)

This is gone...

No, I really am not OK. I'm better, but not OK. I miss her desperately! But her hip gave out completely and there was no chance of her walking again. So, as much as it killed me, I let her go. It was the right thing- but it was awful. It's been almost five months and I still cry, I still reach for her. She's buried at home in Florida under the same tree where my horse is buried. And yes, I buried her with a tennis ball. 

It's almost football season!

Not technically an update, but very pertinent information none the less! 39 days, people. 39 days until LSU kicks off the 2013 season. I...AM...READY!

Being an Aunt is still completely amazing!

It truly is. My friend Sally said to me the other day (about her nephew), "I never knew I could love someone so much." That explains it perfectly. I had no idea that my heart could contain so much love and joy surrounding four little people. Holy Moly- they are awesome! 

Louisiana Warrior Dash

I am so awesome, people!

Seriously. I don't even know how to tell you how awesome I truly am.

I did the Louisiana Warrior Dash with Niki and her family. And I was pretty sure I would
#1: die
or
#2: not finish.

But I did neither! I made all of the obstacles, finished in an hour and a half, and LOVED it! I was pretty nervous the week before. See, up until 3 weeks out I had no idea there were obstacles... or fire...or barbed wire... I thought it was a nice, fun, stroll through the mud. And I love mud! Nope- it has 12 obstacles and is described as 3 miles of pure hell on the website. I am a clumsy oaf, folks. I was scared!

And then they send the release form, which informs you that you must have insurance, the obstacles are extremely dangerous, there will be fire, barbed wire and other forms of torture (my words, not theirs), you have to swim through water of unknown sources, there may be harmful plants and bugs... and, of course, they are responsible for nothing that may befall you. It was a good read...

Let's review:
It started off as about a mile of trekking through knee to ankle deep, slippery, sliding, mud or muddy water. That alone was quite an accomplishment. Then there were 12 obstacles and more running (walking in our case) through sand and mud:

Capsized Catamaran:
We had to jump into muddy water, swim up to, and climb on some floating plastic "stuff". Then you balance your way across and climb down.

Teetering Traverse:
This was my first big challenge. It was a (muddy) balance beam about 8 feet off the ground. Sounds easy, but I am afraid of heights. Almost barfed, but I made it. This nice girl named Kathryn held my hand. :)

Trenches:
A crawl through a dug-out trench with barbed wire. The bad part was you were crawling over pebbles. My knees have scars to prove it!

These nice people got hay to crawl on!

Warrior Wall:

I dreaded this all week! I have zero upper body strength and I am petrified of climbing and heights. But I wanted to at least try. The guy in front of me saw me quaking in fear and told me to use my arms only to hold on, and push myself up with my legs. I made it!! I was ridiculously proud and Niki and I hugged and jumped in circles after we both made it. 

The little "steps" are not even half an inch deep! And our wall was taller than this. 

Storming Normandy:

This was more under barbed-wire and net crawling. 

Barricade Breakdown:

This obstacle was under/over hurdles. Which doesn't sounds too hard until you remember you have been going for a while and your legs really don't want to push you over!

Hard Rain:

A wall to climb up with water pouring down on you the entire way. The worst part for me was having to jump 10 feet down on the other side. I almost crawled back down and walked around.

Tipsy Tightrope:

This is two ropes, one about your head and one under your feet. You have to shimmy along the rope to the other side. 

Cargo Climb:

This one was fun! Climb up, over and down a cargo net. There was a camera projecting to the finish and waiting area so I took the opportunity to wiggle my mud covered booty at everyone!

Junkyard Jump:

Run through tires and climb over junk heap cars. This is pretty fun because, really, when else do you get to jump up and down on the top of a car?

Warrior Roast:

Poor Niki almost didn't go for this one- you jump over fire. We held hands and screamed the entire way. Luckily, there were photographers at this one so I'll be sure to post those lovely shots when available. 

Muddy Mayhem:

You have to scramble/swim through muddy water under even more barbed wire. These people loved their barbed wire. 

This is our post race victory photo!

The Pink Warriors: Niki, Ashley, Mama Ruth and Staci (team captain)

I have never done any kind of a race (and seeing as I hate running, I don't plan to)- but this was an absolute ball! It's a great thing to do with friends and go it together for some laughs. I was a little sore the next day, and I think it was three showers later before I got all of the mud, leaves and grass off- but it was completely worth it! 

As one lady behind us commented: "This is just an excuse for adults to play in the mud."

Yep! 

Quotable!

I love quotes. i could probably have an entire wall in my house full of quotes. Pinterest makes my obsession so much easier! Especially the people at Some E Cards. LOVE those!! Here are a few of my faves since i started using Pinterest.

This happened to me so many times in Florida! Now i just avoid meetings.

I hate camping.

I learned this from my Mama

Geaux Tigers!!!

Amen!

A Staunch Demublican

So, I was talking to my friend Ashley (yes, we have the same name and yes, that's how we became friends) last night and discussing politics. I enjoy discussing politics- crazy, I know. But I should clarify; I enjoy discussing politics if you are able to do so in a sane, unemotional way. You know how they are always talking about the 1% and the 99%? Well, there is another demographic that fits into that ratio: the percentage of people that can discuss politics rationally. And just so you know- no one on FOX or CNN have the ability to do so. MSNBC tries.

At any rate, we were discussing our political affiliations and I finally declared myself a Demublican. I'm too conservative to be a full on Democrat. I believe in things in moderation, and calculated, planned change. Sorry- not right wing enough. On the other hand- the GOP is really just a party of old, fat, white good ole boys. I am much too progressive for that. So there you go- I am a Demublican. I can't be an Independent because that party gets nothing done- and I am a get it done kind of girl.

After our chat, I thought about it more. You know- it really would be nice if we could all just be American. Nieves idea, I know this. But united we stand and divided we fall. And let's face it- we are divided and we are falling as of late. So maybe instead of bashing each other through November we could try to grow that 1%.

Hahaha- yeah right!

This is Ashley, fondly referred to as "AC." How cute are we?