I was attacked by a chair

Sometimes, I truly believe I attract odd events. It probably doesn't help that I currently live with a crazy old lady.

<--- see crazy old lady.











So, this morning I was leaving for work and trying to be on time. This was slightly difficult has Sal has just returned from her 50th high school reunion and was getting me up to date on the guy who took her virginity. So fun.

I finally made it out the door to find that someone had lost a large, blue velvet recliner in our driveway. I use the term "lost" loosely as there is no way that thing could bounce out of your truck without you noticing. So I go in and get Sal, laughing, actually, because she just told me last week she wanted a new recliner. We headed out to move it; me in my work clothes, her in a loosely attached bath robe. As we drug it across the street (she refused to let it sit in her front yard and preferred it be in the neighbor's) we noticed its "innards" seemed to be falling out of the bottom, and as I took a step I jabbed my big toe onto the end of one of the springs and cut my toe. All this while the traffic is backed up by about 5 cars of kids on their way to the high school around the corner. Finally, we got the chair situated in the neighbors yard, the cars passed and I hobbled back across the road to clean up. Who knew a toe could bleed so much???

Obviously, I was not on time to work this morning.
I found another piece of the chair farther down the road and left it alone.